Holiday season is coming up. For some, this can be an exciting time to decorate, give gifts, and spend time with friends and family. However, the holidays can also bring stressors that we don’t normally experience during the rest of the year: the pressure to spend time with family members who may be challenging for us, deciding whether or not we want to travel, or to come up with excess money to spend on holiday parties, gifts, or fancy meals. How do you reduce your vulnerability to holiday stress? Read our self-care tips for the holidays.
One of many self-care tips is Cope Ahead!
Quick refresher!
This skill walks you through the process of anticipating emotionally triggering or stressful situations and lets you rehearse how you will handle it. This skill helps you work through the response of your Emotion Mind and tap into your Wise Mind.
Pro Tip!
Remember, it’s important to be honest when you’re working through the Cope Ahead process. If you can get real with yourself about situations that are hard for you, Cope Ahead can help you plan how you’re going to get through it.
How can this help?
Take a moment and think about what stresses you out about the holidays. For some people, this may mean answering questions from prying family members about your life plan (“What’s your relationship status?” “How is your job going?” “Have you bought a house yet?”). Other people may struggle with the social anxiety that accompanies group gatherings. Or perhaps, they struggle with the fact that they can’t afford extravagant presents, and stress every year about the disappointment they will experience after gift-giving. Creating a plan for these stressful situations you may anticipate is something that is extremely helpful during the holiday season!
What are the steps for Cope Ahead?
The first step is to describe the situation you’re dealing with. State the facts of how this situation usually goes for you. Be really specific about the situation, including any emotions that are likely to come up and interfere with your response.
Once you’ve described the situation, you can decide which problem-solving skills you want to use to deal with it. Again, it’s important to be specific here. Write down exactly how you will cope.
Next, you will imagine the situation. Run through the entire thing in your head from start to finish. Remember to imagine yourself in the situation, not as a bystander. As you imagine the situation, rehearse your coping skills. Practice what you’re going to say and what you’re going to do, and how you’re going to say + do them. Practice what you will do in the worst case scenario. Practice how you will deal with any new problems that arise during the situation.
Finally, once you’ve rehearsed every possible scenario you can imagine, practice relaxation. Actively practicing relaxation helps you to remember that you can survive the situation, and it can help relieve the mental stress of running through this scenario in your mind.
What are some other self-care tips?
- Set limits: Decide how long you want to stay at a certain place and how long you want to see a certain person, and stick to your plan.
- Set a daily schedule: Try to plan your day to balance activities when you are with others and activities when you are alone. Also, maintain a consistent sleeping schedule to make sure you’re at your best physically and emotionally.
- Meaning: Discover your own meaning for the holidays by asking yourself what you appreciate most and make sure that you focus on it.
- Spend time the way you want to: Choose people and places to spend most of your time with that add to your overall mental well-being, rather than deplete and challenge it.
- Take care of yourself: Refrain from mood-altering substances, take medication as prescribed, connect with others, rest, and find enjoyment in your activities.
Whether you embrace or dread this time of the year, the best way to get through this season is by taking care of yourself to the best of your ability. It’s easy at this time of the year to get so caught up in the big picture that we forget to take care of ourselves. If you love the holiday season, taking care of yourself enhances the joy and reduces the stress. If you dread the season, taking care of yourself makes it more tolerable and easier to get through. By doing so, you may surprise yourself and discover that you can in fact create for yourself a magical holiday season.
“Self-care is giving the world the best of you, instead of what’s left of you.” – Katie Reed
